Food and I have had a love/hate relationship for most of my life. I was an emotional eater for many years. I would get sad and eat. I would get angry and eat. I would be happy and eat. I would also reward myself with food for a job well done. You get the picture. It was not a pretty sight. I would never choose “healthy” foods to make myself feel better. In fact, the sweeter and more chocolatey the food the better. I would dive into the foods thinking they would make me feel better, and of course there were times I wouldn’t think about it at all. It was just a natural reaction for me to reach for food. In the end, I felt miserable and packed on the pounds one bite at a time. At some point though, it was as if a switch flipped inside of my mind. I began to notice I no longer felt the need to turn to food when I was stressed or emotional.
AND THEN IT HIT! Yesterday, a tidal wave of emotion and disappointment flooded me. The first thing I wanted was a platter of homemade chocolate chip cookies or double fudge brownies. Sugar cookies would’ve sufficed as well. However, almost as soon as I had those desires I told my husband. He asked me what I was going to do. I looked at him and said that I wasn’t going to eat out of the emotion and that I was glad we no longer kept those kinds of foods in the house. I decided to instead deal with my frustrations and opted for a couple of graham crackers (well maybe 3 graham crackers), a bottle of water, and a workout. Was that the best choice? Maybe/Maybe not, but I consider it a success because I normally would have wallowed in self-pity and devoured the entire chocolate cake all by myself.
I am feeling better today, and I know that I am extremely blessed. ❤